It seems I am fated never to get a full night’s sleep as prescribed by those in the know (I’ve heard all kinds of “ideal” lengths of sleep, from six to nine hours a night). I cannot remember the last time I got eight unbroken hours in the Land of Nod. In fact, now that I come to think of it, I can’t even remember the last time I got six undisturbed hours of peaceful slumber.
My most recent bout of disturbances ended in me getting even less time under the duvet than usual, with an element of panic thrown in just to keep things interesting.
I am used to the alarm clock going off at silly-o-clock in the morning, as my husband is a postie, and so I’ve been used to a brief rise to wakefulness at about 3:30am, five mornings from seven, but I eventually doze off again and get another couple of hours kip before my alarm rings and I get up. This week, however, Royal Mail changed the start times of all the postal delivery men and women, so we were getting an extra hour before the usual early-morning wake-up shenanigans.
This morning, the alarm went off at 4:30am and instead of hubby switching it off, moaning and getting up as usual, it kept on ringing. And ringing. And ringing. As a result, I fully regained consciousness and woke to find myself alone in bed. I called out to hubby and received no reply. Feeling uneasy, I threw back the covers and worked my way through the flat, hunting for my other half to no avail. He was nowhere to be seen. I started to worry – had he started sleepwalking and was he outside somewhere, naked and cold? Had he – oh my gods – had he left me? Had he waited till I was asleep, grabbed a bag and vanished into the night? Where on earth could he be?
I took a few deep breaths and thought – he might have his mobile phone with him – I’ll call him! I dialled the number and was dismayed to hear his phone ringing somewhere in the flat. Then I heard a key in the front door and realised the ringing was coming from outside!
He sheepishly explained that he had woken up, noticed the time and thought he had overslept, quickly got dressed, grabbed his things and run to the pick-up point where he thought he’d missed his ride, then called the office only to be told he was an entire hour early!
Of course, I was now wide awake and he had left for the second time before I dropped off again.
Only to be disturbed an hour or so later by a couple arguing right outside my bedroom window. Screaming, crying, her slapping him and crying some more, storming off and returning to the same point in the street.
I gave up and got up at 6:42am.
So much for getting a lie-in on the weekend, eh?
On the plus-side, the man from Scottish Gas has been back and sorted out the problem with the hot water in the bathroom, so at long last I’ll be able to have my soak in the tub tonight!